Death Bear is ready for Valentine's Day. (Photo: animalnewyork.com)

“I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.”
- Bene Gesserit “Litany Against Fear” from Frank Herbert’s “Dune”

We fear emotional pain more than anything else brewed in the nightmare world buried deep within the heart of dreams. This pain can take many forms, from the loss of a child to the fear of death. How many of us are able to face our fear? Like a knight at the end of the journey, can we place the pieces upon the board and still maintain the focus needed to endure beyond hopelessness?

Death Bear is available for the lovelorn

How we deal with a relationship that has met its end is another exercise in dealing with our fear. For those who need a little help, Death Bear is there, free of charge. You won’t need a pay day loan for his services. Nate Hill, a 32-year-old Brooklyn performance artist, will dress as Death Bear, come to your home and take away most all that your former lover leaves behind. The broken heart remains, of course. Even Valentine’s Day can’t heal that. We must suffer and we must persevere.

Death Bear’s mission statement

Straight from Death Bear’s Web site:

“We all have someone or something we would rather just forget. Things fall apart. Love hurts. Dreams die. But when you summon Death Bear to your door, you can rest assured that help has come.

“Death Bear will take things from you that trigger painful memories and stow them away in his cave where they will remain forever, allowing you to move on with your life. Give him an ex’s clothes, old photos, mementos, letters, etc. Death Bear is here to assist you in your time of tragedy, heartbreak and loss.”

Interestingly, Hill told “Today” that he holds on to much of what he takes.

Why is it easier for us to give up part of ourselves to an anonymous Death Bear?

A seven-foot cartoon character in black, Death Bear treats his customers with great politeness. Letting go of material objects to Death Bear is mostly symbolic, but I think the fact that people do not see the face of another human being in the transaction girds the heart. It keeps the dam from bursting, keeps the caravan of loss from carving a path through the lines of years. Or it could be that a cartoon bear keeps it from hurting.

Occupy yourself

Death Bear has his role, but the real work rests upon those left behind. Be good to yourself after a breakup – within reason. Don’t shut out your friends and don’t shut yourself in your cave for too long. Go outside, avoid self-destructive behaviors and remember that you are valuable. Your pay day loan blogger has told himself that before, and the inner eye continues to follow the path of my being.

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The Dude abides in "Crazy Heart." Jeff bridges image from Flickr.

This is not a list of the most romantic movies to go to on Valentine’s Day. It’s a list of the best movies, based on reviews or other factors, that will be playing in theaters on Valentine’s Day.

For instance, the obvious answer to which movie to see on Valentines Day would be “Valentine’s Day.” However, it got terrible reviews, and it seems to be following the “more celebrities, less everything else” trend.  The “Grown Ups” trailer showcases this trend.

I know where you can get the best pay day loans, but I have turned to the experts to find out which movies are best.

1. Crazy Heart

This film got 93 percent good reviews on Rotten Tomatoes and 84 percent good reviews on Metacritic. It won a SAG Award and two Golden Globes, and it was nominated for two Oscars. Plus it has “heart” in the title, so it’s all Valentine’s Day-ey.

2. Avatar

Based on the system I am using, I must include “Avatar.” It got 82 percent good reviews on Rotten Tomatoes and 84 percent on Metacritic. It won tons of awards, and made tons of money. Even though it has been in theaters for weeks and sold enough tickets to break box office records, people are still spilling into theaters too see “Avatar” week after week. Plus, it’s a love story (among other things).

3. An Education

Another award-winner, “An Education” got 95 percent on RT and 85 on Meta. It’s a period piece (1960s), a coming-of-age story (about a girl) and it takes place in London. Isn’t that fancy?

4. The Blind Side

This one has been in theaters for quite a while, but as long as people keep going to see it, it will stay that way. “The Blind Side” is part chick flick and part football movie, so everyone wins!

5. Up in the Air

Another romance, this film contains a lot of layers and a lot of smarts. It also contains George Clooney. This film got a 90 on RT and a Golden Globe.

6. Fantastic Mr. Fox

This is a good one if you want to bring the kids, although it’s built for an adult audience as well. It got 93 percent good reviews on RT, and it was directed by the ever-fascinating Wes Anderson.

7. Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief

This film comes out Friday, and despite how ridiculous the trailers look, it got good reviews. If you like fantasy films that involve Greek mythology and want to avoid mush altogether on Valentine’s Day, this one’s a good bet.

8. Youth in Revolt

I am a Michael Cera fan. However, when I first saw the commercials for “Youth in Revolt,” I thought, “Yawn, another angsty teen film starring Michael Cera as the awkward guy in love. However, now that I’ve seen that it got 71 percent good reviews on Rotten Tomatoes, I just might give it a shot.

9. The Lovely Bones

This movie seems to be surrounded in contradictions. It was lambasted by critics, but nominated for an Oscar and a Golden Globe. Reviews say it is filled with “abrupt shifts between horrific violence and cloying sentimentality.” You be the judge.

10. The Wolfman

OK, this one doesn’t follow my system. It got bad reviews. But if you want to have an anti-Valentine’s Day movie date, this horror flick will do the trick.

Maybe I should ask him if he wants a Chillow Pillow.

My boyfriend and I have an ongoing disagreement about temperature; when it’s time to go to sleep, he wants the fan on and I want it off. I had kind of accepted that this would just be the way it is — that sometimes I’d have to put up with having the fan on, and sometimes he had to put up with leaving it off.

However, today I learned about the Chillow Pillow, and though I don’t believe in miracle products that solve all of your problems, I am curious about whether it would help. It just might be worth the $25 to find out, especially because Valentine’s Day is coming up, so I’ll be spending some money on him anyway. Sure, it’s not super romantic, but it is something that very well might make him more comfortable, and it’s not so expensive that I’d need a low rate personal loan to afford it.

What is a Chillow Pillow?

From what I can see on the web site, the Chillow Pillow is a pad you place on top of your pillow. The Chillow Store says “The Chillow acts as a radiator for your body. It uses water to absorb, and then dissipate heat back to the surrounding air, leaving a cool sensation.” Though the Chillow Pillow is filled with water, the web site assures that it stays dry on the outside.

It seems to me the Chillow is basically a specially shaped water bottle. My friend who had one said there’s a sponge inside that holds the water, and it needs to be changed sometimes. While most users report that the Chillow Pillow did, in fact, stay dry, there is always the threat of the Chillow Pillow sprouting a leak or getting a hole in it somehow.

Will I buy a Chillow Pillow?

I haven’t quite decided yet, though I should really kick this plan into action, seeing as Valentine’s Day is this weekend. The Chillow Store is having a buy one, get one half off sale, so now would be a good time if I want to try it, too. It sure would be nice to sleep without the fan on from now on.

What do you think? Have any of you used a Chillow Pillow? Do you think I should get it?

Now there's a tradition I can get behind! Image from Flickr.

Ah, Valentine’s Day. I never know whether to mock it, celebrate it or ignore it. So, I decided to do some research on what this holiday is really all about, and I found that a lot of what people believe about Valentine’s Day is inaccurate. So, right here on this instant payday loans site, I shall debunk 10 myths about Valentine’s Day.

1. St. Valentine was one dude

Valentine’s Day has been around since 496 AD, when Pope Gelasius I established it. Originally, St. Valentine’s Day honored Christian martyrs Valentine of Rome and Valentine of Terni. They both died defending their beliefs a couple of hundred years before the holiday was established.

2. It’s always been about love

The guys named Valentine who were originally honored on Valentine’s Day and the holiday itself were not connected to love. For more than 500 years, St. Valentine’s Day was strictly about honoring martyrs.

3. The holiday behind the holiday

Scholars believe that Valentine’s Day became a celebration of love rather than martyrdom because of Lupercalia, a festival of fertility that existed before Valentine’s Day. The pagan festival was celebrated Feb. 13-15. Historians believe Valentine’s Day is another example of Christians taking over a pagan holiday and giving it a religious meaning.

4. Men always forget Valentine’s Day

Men in the United States spend about twice as much money on Valentine’s Day as women do.

5. It’s still a shout-out to the saints

In 1969 the Official Roman Catholic Calendar of Saints was altered, and Valentine’s Day was removed from the General Roman Calendar because whoever makes decisions about the General Roman Calendar recognized that they didn’t know anything about these Valentine guys. So now, Valentine’s Day is just another Pagan-ceremony-turned-Christian-holiday-turned-just-a–result-of-advertising.

6. Diamonds are the perfect Valentine

The tradition of giving paper valentines has been around for more than 200 years. It wasn’t until the 1980s when the diamond industry came up with a marketing campaign that people started spending hundreds or thousands of dollars on Valentine’s Day gifts.

7. Singles Awareness Day is not a real holiday

It’s on Wikipedia! Need I say more?

8. Valentine’s Day is awesome in elementary school

Sure, it’s all fun and candy in kindergarten. But as kids get older, Valentine’s Day increasingly becomes a festival of hurt feelings, jealousy and tattle-telling.

9. Valentine’s Day is the same everywhere

In Norfolk, “Jack” Valentine leaves candy and presents on the back porch for the kids. In Slovenia, Valentine’s Day marks the start of working in the fields. In Moringa, Japan, it is customary for women to give chocolate to their male coworkers.

10. Everyone loves Valentine’s Day

Hindu fundamentalists explicitly discourage Valentine’s Day. Certain factions denounce it as cultural pollution from the West. The opposition often results in violent clashes between die-hard fundamentalists and shopkeepers who sell Valentine’s Day stuff. Also, the sale of Valentine’s Day items is banned in Saudi Arabia.

I would love to take out a payday loan and get my wife something remarkable for Valentine’s Day but paying back the loan wouldn’t be so remarkable. So, I had to come up with ideas. As usual, the internet is the fountain of all knowledge and full of suggestions – some not so, er, shall we say, suitable. But I got some good ideas which I am happy to pass on.

Flowers?

The most common Valentine’s Day advertisement is “surprise your Valentine with flowers”. I suppose I could apply for that Payday Loan I talked about, to cover the cost of a really impressive bunch of flowers but on second thought, I’ll look for a reasonably priced bouquet at my local grocery store and deliver it myself.

Now that I think of it, my Valentine would be surprised to get flowers from me. She knows I am not a flower guy and being my wife, might start wondering why I’m suddenly giving her flowers. You’ve got the picture, right?

Something other than flowers?

Maybe I should look around for something a little more creative and surprising, something we can do together, something that will surprise her positively.

A chocolate fountain?

Chocolate Fountain First Birthday Party

How about a chocolate fountain? If your Valentine is a chocoholic like mine she will love you for your thoughtfulness – and you can join in the licking as well. I was surprised to find one on sale at my local department store for only $19.99. No payday loan needed here.

A trip?

How about a surprise trip? You blindfold her, drive her to the airport and hop on a plane to somewhere. Don’t tell her where you are going until you arrive. Just be careful about where the plane is going – not all the destinations in the travel brochures are romantic. There are still cannibals around.

A new car?

This is always an impressive gift and there are some great deals on cars now. I saw an ad – ‘buy one and get one free’. You’ll get a deal on a Regular Model for your Valentine plus the convertible GTO sports job for you-know-who!

A Payday Loan

OK. I’ve gotten a little carried away, haven’t I? We’re back to needing a payday loan for these unexpected, expensive, gifts. Here’s something unexpected– you fill out the Payday Loan application for your Valentine but you link it to her salary. Surprise!

A picnic?

Seriously, back to a gift that’s affordable. A picnic is always good. If it’s to be out in the fields or the forest remember to take a blanket and a spray bottle of insect repellent. I prefer the indoor type of picnic where we spread a blanket on the floor near the lit fireplace with candles on the mantle and a couple of bottles of bubbly within easy reach. Take a spray bottle of child or neighbor repellent, as necessary.

A weekend?

If you do have a little more money, spread your Valentine’s Day into a weekend. Plan a “getaway” to a bed and breakfast place, not a hotel room. Choose one near enough or far away enough (or far out enough) to do the trick. Add home cooked or gourmet meals and a bottle of great wine.

What will actually happen?

All of these are great ideas. If you can try one of them without causing any damage to your budget, that’s great. In my experience, the planning is most of the fun.

Then there’s real life–

There’s a knock at the front door. The stove technician. This is the third time he’s been out this week. I hate spending money on the stove when I have Valentine’s gifts to buy. But, we’ve already been eating fries for a month now, my cholesterol’s through the roof and my blood pressure’s over the top as well. Where’s that Payday Loan – it looks like I’ll need it after all.

Sometimes people go a little overboard on Valentines Day

Like it does every year, February signals not just declarations and validations of love and affection, but an opportunity to know what payday loans are for.  Why?  Just research the huge amount Americans spend on flowers, gifts, and dinner dates every Valentine’s Day and you’ll get the picture.

The Financial Tradition of Love

Not to take away the romantic essence of this much-celebrated occasion, but this is one perfect example of how our consumerist culture has maximized the all-encompassing emotion of love—through a host of symbols, as well as merchandise, that promise different ways to express those three sacred words.  “I love you” can mean a cute teddy bear for a sixteen-year-old, a bouquet of designer roses for the twenty-something, and a fabulous diamond ring for the woman in a long-term relationship.

And this is not limited to women—men are known to receive some of the most extravagant, albeit unnecessary, gifts of love during Valentine’s Day.  And then, most restaurants count this occasion as one of their most lucrative; try to get a reservation on the day itself and you’ll most likely be turned away for lack of space.  The day of hearts is indeed one to remember, and if you’re the kind who actively participates in the revelry, your wallet won’t find this day easy to forget.

Celebrate Love in Different Ways

While it is traditional for most to go all out on this annual event, love can still be celebrated in other ways.  How about making your own present, such as a poem or a blog dedicated to your special someone?  You can also search online for Valentine’s Day-themed recipes to prepare at home, or make your significant other’s favorite meal, and just spend a romantic evening at home.

All that would only require a few dollars to spend for ingredients and some candles to complete the mood—time is what you’ll be investing in, and that would mean much more than any store-bought gift.  Perhaps you can even enjoy a romantic stroll in the park, and spend the rest of the evening looking up at the stars.  Cheesy?  Maybe, but on Valentine’s Day, all those restrictions are off.

You Can Choose To Spend, But Wisely

OK, so you may think Valentine’s Day trumps all other occasions, which means you’re really dead set on making it the most memorable ever.  If this means having to part with your hard-earned money or whipping out your credit card, then you better make sure you get the best you can buy.

But what if you had your heart set on it, then went ahead and spent your money on that formal dinner in the city’s best restaurant and an overnight stay at a five-star hotel, then realized you don’t have the money to pay your bills? You might want to take a look into getting payday loans.  No, it’s not an excuse to spend like there’s no tomorrow, but a means to tide you over if you’ve gone overboard on this special day.  You can borrow between $100 and $1,500.  Just remember to keep track of everything and be prepared to pay the money back in the agreed to terms.

Love does conquer all, but the key is making the relationship work. Knowing there are payday loans may help you keep that relationship working.  In the meantime, have a happy Valentine’s Day and enjoy every minute of it!