MODERN TIMES

“MOM! I need a cell phone!”   Things certainly are different from when I was a teenager. It would be called the ‘dark ages’ if you asked my kids. It was before cell phones, the internet, and mp3 players. Yep, I guess from their perspective times were archaic.  How did I get to volleyball practice without phoning my parents? I could have been kidnapped! Well, that may sound ridiculous, but so are my teenagers. If they’re not in a growth spurt and needing new pants every five minutes (which they wear sooo low that I wonder what is holding them up!), then they are in the middle of some drama that I could not possibly understand. Oy vey!

CONSUMING MASS QUANTITIES OF FOOD

Anyone out there ever seen Coneheads? Remember the breakfast scene?  That would be a scene played out in my kitchen after school.  They all file in the back door (an avalanche of back packs) with their friends in tow. I know that they are ravenous, and I try to plan for that.  However, when they are in that state (like a pride of lions crowding over a slab of meat), anything goes. I will come home from work to find that along with the frozen burritos having been consumed, that they ate all the pickles, cottage cheese, and a box of Cheerios. Now, that doesn’t even make any sense.  But neither do my teenagers. Knowing that my grocery budget is blown, I will pick up the phone and get quick payday loans to get me through. They can eat their weight in chicken chimichangas.  Don’t ask me how I know.

SAVE YOUR DRAMA FOR YOUR MAMA

There is a lot of pressure on our kids these days, but how much of that is a bad thing? For example, are there any of you parents out there who’s a ‘rescuer’?  That used to be me (once upon a time).  I couldn’t stand the thought of my ‘baby’ suffering in any way.  Never mind the fact that he may be hitting puberty and is almost 6 ft. tall!  If my girls were late to school (overslept, makeup woes, clothing dilemmas), they would bound up the stairs to declare “I need you to call the office for me mommy. You work sooo hard!  Gee mom, are you getting thinner?”  Yep!  They played me like a harp.   But now, they are accountable for their own choices, including the expensive ones.  Need a cell phone or an iPod?  Here, let me show you what a snow shovel looks like (I understand that they are hard to find these days!) and go see if you can make a few pennies.  Now, they have begun to have an appreciation for how hard it is to earn that dollar and consequently, they are not so quick to part with it.  I want them to have some idea of financial responsibility before they leave home.

SOFT PLACE TO LAND

Knowing that adulthood is looming like a semi truck in my rearview mirror, I would like for my teenagers to begin to take some ownership of their choices in life.  We all make mistakes and home should be a safe haven, but it also should equip them for the road ahead. Hopefully this is done before they leave the nest. However, if they find when they get out in the real world that they need a little extra cash, I’ll let them know that they can get help through payday loans.  It’s worked for mom.