Constance McMillen wanted to wear a tuxedo to her prom. Image from Flickr.

Prom may or may not carry the best memories for everyone, but it is a tradition for most high school students – getting fast cash loans so they can dress up and have a good night. The ACLU has been offering help to high school senior Constance McMillen, who is now fighting to have her high school reinstate their canceled prom. The school board of Itawamba Agricultural High School announced recently that it would be canceling Prom rather than defend their decision to not allow Constance McMillen to bring her girlfriend to the dance.

Constance McMillen just wanted to go to Prom

Itawamba High School, where Constance McMillen is a senior informed her earlier this year that she would not be allowed to both bring her sophomore girlfriend to the dance and to wear a tuxedo, as she had planned. Constance McMillen then contacted the American Civil Liberties Union of Mississippi, who sent a letter to the district asking that they change their policy. The school then circulated a memo to students, including Constance McMillen, specifically prohibiting same-sex couples at the school dance.

Itawamba high school cancels Prom because of Constance McMillen’s involvement

In the statement recently released, the school board indicated that “Due to the distractions to the educational process caused by recent events, the Itawamba County School District has decided to not host a prom at Itawamba Agricultural High School this year.” Later in the statement, as reported by Clarion-Ledger, they “encouraged the community to organize a private prom.” No organization has yet stepped up and offered to take on the short term loan of students in formal wear for an evening.

Constance McMillen’s reaction to the cancellation

In her interview with USA Today, Constance McMillen reacted to the announcement: “Oh, my God. That’s really messed up because the message they are sending is that if they have to let gay people go to prom that they are not going to have one,” she said. “A bunch of kids at school are really going to hate me for this.” Constance also pointed out that “If they set it up privately they probably aren’t going to allow gay people to go and there is nothing that you can do about it.”

The constitutional concerns of Constance McMillen’s situation

In a prepared statement, Constance McMillen outlined the concerns she has about the school board’s decision. “All I want is the same chance to enjoy my prom night like any other student. But my school would rather hurt all the students than treat everyone fairly. This isn’t just about me and my rights anymore — now I’m fighting for the opportunity of all the students at my school to have our prom.” The ACLU is framing this debate as a constitutional issue of free speech. They argue that as a publicly funded institution, Itawamba Agricultural High School cannot ban Constance McMillen from attending prom based on her choice of date or clothing choices. They also argue that equal protection prohibits publicly funded schools from banning gay students from school activities. The school is defending itself by claiming that Constance McMillen and her girlfriend attending prom would create distractions that would damage education in the school.

How have situations like Constance McMillen’s been decided in the past?

High schools across the nation have a patchwork of policies about gay students and school activities. As USA Today reported, some schools do allow same-sex dates while others continue to ban homosexual couples. There are also some schools, that have bans but do not enforce them. Schools are allowed very wide latitude by most courts in determining the eligibility and limitations on school events, clubs, and activities.

Parents have had to turn to short term loans to fund prom dresses and tuxes, proving that even a teenager’s prom night has been affected by the recession. Every high school student looks to their prom as a huge event filled with anticipation and planning. Dresses, tuxedos, corsages, parties, and limos all play a part in the grand festivities, making it a night to remember. Unfortunately with the lagging economy, many families are having a difficult time providing the added expense. Single mother Cara Donaldson stated, “My daughter has been planning her junior prom since her freshman year. It was a given that she’d have the works…the expensive dress, limo ride, her first adult night on the town. But once the recession came, we were at a standstill financially. We had to put her on a strict budget. I didn’t want to say no to her special night, but we had to cut back drastically on the extras.”

The dress

Many prom planners have the same attitude. Daniel Reynolds, owner of a dress shop, already cut his dresses from 5-10% to increase sales. “We order dresses a year in advance,” he stated. “And when the economy went the way it did, I thought ‘Uh-oh, I ordered too many dresses’.”

Communities can help

In some communities, the prom-issue is being faced head-on. One city in Connecticut bonded together in an effort to help their teenagers go to the prom. Local businesses and citizens all donated gently-worn party clothing. The administrators of school set up a storefront in a classroom and allowed students to come in and pay what they could afford for clothing. For many students this was the only way they could meet the expense of a formal outfit.

Lay-a-way

Another solution is to rely on store’s lay-a-way plans. Some parents commit their children to an outfit early and then start paying on it little by little. Lay-a-way programs allow consumers to make payments, as the store holds their merchandise. When the items are paid off, the customer takes the items. Donna Sarwich of Madison, Wisconsin said, “Lay-a-way has proven invaluable in this economy. We had it planned down to the exact weekend we’d need the dress and accessories, but without lay-a-way there’s no way we could have afforded prom at all.”

Parents’ reactions

Parents want to give their children the best. Many are seeing the upcoming expenses of teenagers and are trying to cut back early. Daniel Schiller, father of three children all under 16, stated, “I know that we are going to have bigger expenses as the children grow. We are saving now, cutting back wherever we can. There are going to be dances we have to say no to, but some we are fitting into our budget without question— junior and senior prom being two of them.”

This forethought into children’s social lives is a result of the economic decay of the recession. People still want to provide well for their families, but with caution and careful planning. Some are using trust fund money, short term loans and savings to fund these extras. But all people are sorting through those extras and picking only the most important ones to participate in.

How will things change?

No one knows how things will change in the future. It is possible spending will go back to normal once the economy balances itself out again. Most economists agree that once things regain normalcy, Americans will adjust by returning to their usual buying plans. Economist Albert Moonroth says, “People will return to spending, but cautiously at first. It’s like going out for the first time after a long, cold winter. You open the door slowly, but once you see the weather has changed, you just sit back and enjoy it.” In the meantime consumers will continue to be resourceful about finding funding. Short term loans, lay-a-way plans and dipping into nest eggs will carry them through the financial struggle until the recession is over.

Everyone's got a prom story. Tyler Frost's just might beat yours.

Tyler Frost knew he was going to a school that didn’t allow hand holding, dancing or listening to rock ‘n’ roll. However, he says he doesn’t see anything in the Heritage Christian High School handbook saying students are required to follow school rules after school or on weekends.

Nonetheless, Tyler Frost was suspended because he attended Findlay High School’s prom with his girlfriend. The Ohio teen says it was worth it, and he and his step father told a morning news show that they plan to sue the school.

Harsh punishment

Tyler Frost was required to get a permission slip to attend Findlay High School’s prom. When he brought the slip to his principal, the principal said he could be suspended and possibly not graduate if he went to the dance.

Most kids have to endure begging for personal loans from their parents to pay for tuxes and limos and flowers, but that’s nothing compared to what it might cost Tyler Frost.

Tyler Frost went anyway, and he says he has no regrets. However, because of his suspension, he faces the possibility of not being able to take his final exams on time and thus not being able to graduate on time. These are the grounds on which Tyler Frost’s family might sue the school.

Strange circumstances

You can watch a video of Tyler Frost’s interview with “The Early Show” at the CBS News web site. Strangely, after sitting quietly through the interview and saying a few brief words about the grounds for a suing Heritage Christian High School, Tyler Frost’s step father gets up walks off the set without explanation.

Much to be determined

There’s no word on the amount Tyler Frost and his family will seek if they file a lawsuit against Heritage Christian High School. The step father says that an attorney is just starting to look at the case today.

Pop culture repeats itself?

Many media outlets are drawing the comparison between the 1980s film “Footloose” and Tyler Frost’s situation. CBS News says:

A tale reminiscent of the 1980s film “Footloose” has made it to reality.

“Footloose,” made in 1984, stars Kevin Bacon. The movie tells the story of a boy, Ren McCormack, who moves to a town where rock music and dancing are banned. Bacon starts a movement to abolish the ban.

Of course, the differences are easy to see. Heritage Christian is a high school, not a whole town. And Tyler Frost isn’t looking to change any rules, he simply wanted to go to the high school prom with his girlfriend. However, Tyler Frost did buck the system by going to the dance even after he was told what the consequences would be, so perhaps there is a little bit of Ren in him.

For many young women, prom is an exciting time, a time of glamor, sparkle and beauty. Some of them may enjoy the chance to fulfill a princess fantasy (straight out of Bettelheim), others may see it as a rite of passage into womanhood and still more may view it as an insidious torture device. Whatever the case, it’s hard not to have an opinion.

But obtaining the proper princess garb (or princely wares, because many guys look forward to prom, too) can be expensive. Tuxedo rentals are an expense, and there are other expenses, depending upon after-prom plans. However, these things tend to pale in comparison with the money (and time) young ladies (and their parents) spend of prom dresses. Quick payday loans or credit cards may help you afford a nice dress, but if it’s only going to be worn once, the wisdom of such a course is debatable.

That’s where the Glass Slipper Project comes in

Kate Ward of the Northwest Arkansas Times reports at http://nwanews.com/nwat/News/75628/ that girls like Hailey Pitts of Fayetteville High School will have the chance to attend their senior prom where chance may not have existed before.

“I’m really excited, but it still kind of freaks me out,” Pitts said “I always knew I’d eventually go; I just can’t believe it’s already here.”

According to Ward, Pitts is one of more than 100 Fayetteville juniors and seniors who will have a dress for prom, thanks to Project Glass Slipper. This program was established by high school counselors who didn’t want cost to affect a student’s ability to attend prom. In addition to a dress, the project provides shoes, jewelry, accessories and a ticket to the event.

Get to the boutique

“About a fourth of our student population is on the free or reduced lunch plan, which is up from last year,” said project founder Leigh Hudson. “I certainly think the economy is a contributing factor. A lot of families have lost their housing or their jobs, which changes their economic status dramatically.”

Hudson started Project Glass Slipper in 2007 by taking donations of prom dresses. In addition to clothing donations, local charities have contributed money to the cause. Last year, donated dresses and other prom-related items were moved into an old elementary school classroom. But don’t let that fool you. We’re talking a hot pink boutique here, complete with rows of clothing racks, dressing rooms with zebra curtains.

“A lot of girls come here expecting to see an old elementary classroom,” Hudson said. “Once they walk inside, they’re all like ‘Wow!’ That’s one of my favorite parts. I love seeing their surprised faces.”

Live the dream, even if it’s just for the moment

Counselors at schools like Fayetteville High make a special effort to extend Glass Slipper invitations to the homeless among the student body. Volunteers who serve as personal shoppers, makeup assistants and dress fitters at the event even help prepare elegant formal invitations ahead of time.

“Most of these girls have never had anyone give them something like this before,” Hudson said. “Some of them are like, ‘Do you want me to give this back when I’m done?’ I always tell them they can donate it back or wear it around their house for as long as they want. It’s theirs to keep so they can do what they want with it.

From sleek and long to short and sequined, the selection is delightfully diverse. Size availability varies, so act early if you plan to use a similar Glass Slipper Project-style boutique in your location. Contact the counseling department of your high school or check out the project’s Web site for more information.

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