The men in black suits who never give up

You can count on them. They never go to the wrong address. And they never forget you. It takes a payday loan to see one of these guys reverse back through the garden gate.

Grandpa’s theory on taxes

My wise old grandfather once told me, on the day I was crying about paying my very first income tax payment, that it was a good sign. “Paying taxes means you are making money,” he explained. “So you have to give the government their share. Think of all the things they do for you. No matter how much tax you pay, you will never have to pay one hundred percent of what you earn. There will always be something left for you. So pay the taxes and smile, my boy. You are winning!”

Okay, grandpa, may you rest in peace, I have always adopted your attitude toward paying taxes.

My current tax rate is 47%, probably double what grandpa paid. Half! I am paying half of what I earn to the government. I get the use of the money for most of the year and I pay small amounts in advances or in monthly installments during the year, but there’s always a big hit in about April, when the income tax department gets their act together and goes out hunting. And that’s when I need a Payday Loan.

My theory on taxes

My attitude towards taxes is simple. I do not wish to pay them. The government should find another way of raising money, especially the big money. How about hiring one of these major rip-off artists like that chap Bernie, and put him to work on something that we will all benefit from. The guy managed to raise 50 billion for himself. Imagine what he could do with the government backing him.

Maybe I should work less?

Feeling rather stupid and completely counter-productive, I did the exercise to see if there is a real difference between working less, earning less and paying less tax, as opposed to working more, earning more and paying more tax. The difference was not dramatic but I am still better off working. As grandpa said, they never hit you for one hundred percent, it just feels like it.

I also found that I was thoroughly disgusted with myself for doing such an exercise – this is me investing in the possibilities of working less? But the culprit here is actually the government who, through imposing these high taxes, is putting these thoughts into my mind. Make it worth my while, Mr. Government and I’ll work many more hours per day!

Facing the showdown

I will pay my taxes because I am a law abiding citizen. I will have to take a payday loan in order to make the payment and I may even have to extend the payback period for more than one month, but I’m sure they will agree to this. Good thing the government isn’t into the payday loan business as well!