Does the hissing cockroach look like romance to you? The Bronx Zoo hopes so. Image: Wikimedia Commons

Finding the perfect gift for your Valentine can be a very tough challenge at time. How about a Valentine’s gift of a hissing cockroach at the New York Bronx Zoo? The gift may sound a bit strange, but the hissing cockroach is romantic creature.

Valentine’s gift of a hissing cockroach from the New York Bronx Zoo

The New York Bronx Zoo is offering a limited 58,000 chances to name a Madagascar Hissing Cockroach. The offer is billed as a special February-only offer that is “perfect for Valentine’s Day.” It costs only $10 to name a Madagascar hissing cockroach, and more than 1,000 people have already bought the honor. The recipient of the gift is mailed a certificate with the name. The $10 price tag goes to preserving wildlife and forests in Madagascar.

Is the Madagascar Hissing Cockroach actually romantic?

Though the name “Madagascar Hissing Cockroach” is a bit off-putting, the Madagascar hissing cockroach is one of the more romantic members of the insect family. Couples often stay together and raise children for a long period of time. The cockroaches are relatively pacifist and do not bite. In short, it may not be quite the same as a box of chocolates, but there are less romantic options in the insect world.

Unique Valentine’s gift ideas

If preserving forests and wildlife by naming a hissing cockroach doesn’t sound quite like your cup of tea, there are other ways to say “I’m thinking of you.” A good gift for Valentine’s day, if you have a significant other, is one that has meaning of some kind. Try a trinket that reminds you of your first date, an evening of undivided attention with no smartphones or televisions, or even just the traditional home-cooked dinner. If you don’t have a special someone, keep in mind that Valentine’s Day is about saying you care, so call your parents or go out for drinks with your friends.

Source

Bronx Zoo Website

A recent study found a link between clowns and IVF success, or successful planting of an embryo through in-vitro fertilization. Image from Wikimedia Commons.

A recent study has found a link between clowns and IVF success, or a successful in-vitro fertilization. The study found that women undergoing IVF treatment were more likely to become pregnant if visited by a “medical clown” because the clowns reduce stress.

Link discovered between clowns and IVF success

A link was recently found between clowns and IVF treatment success during a study done at a research hospital in Israel, according to Reuters. Results of the study indicated that women undergoing in-vitro fertilization treatments had a higher rate of success and becoming pregnant when they were visited by a “medical clown” while recovering from an implantation procedure. The head of the study, Dr. Shevach Friedler, got the idea after reading about the positive effects of laughter as a natural stress reducer. To see if a reduced-stress environment after embryo implantation would increase the chances of successfully implanting a embryo, Dr. Friedler’s team at Harofeh Medical Center arranged for some patients to be visited by a clown in the recovery room.

Study was not just clowning around

Laughter, apparently seemed the best medicine. A greater percentage of women who received the “clown treatment” successfully became pregnant than those who went without a visit from a clown. The study was done using a total of 209 women that were undergoing in-vitro fertilization. Of those 209 women, the clown group had in-vitro fertilization success rates of 36 percent. The women who did not receive the clown treatment had a success rate of only 20 percent. The study is being published in “Fertility and Sterility,” a reproduction science medical journal. There is an actual medical clown college degree at the University of Haifa, in Israel, as clowns do help reduce stress among patients.

Clown may eventually cost extra

In-vitro fertilization is expensive, somewhat dangerous and does not always work. According to WebMD, the procedure results in a pregnancy in 32 percent of all cases, but only 25.6 percent of treatments resulted in a live birth. Success rates also vary by age group and wide range of factors. The average course of treatment costs $12,400 and is usually the last resort after artificial insemination and natural options have been exhausted.

Sources

Reuters

WebMD

(Photo Credit: CC BY/Abi Paramaguru/Cyber Law Centre)

Christmas is here, and whether you’re basking in the warm, fuzzy feelings of friends, family and spiked egg nog or spending it alone in the dark because Santa stole your girl and you’re waiting for the round mound to slip down the chimney and come within range of your electric cattle prod, it’s time for reflection. Here are some Christmas quotes to warm your heart or give you reason to go back to the drawing board on your five-year plan.

Christmas quotes for the rest of us

“A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to all the world” — Charles Dickens. Dickens loved to tell stories, and his experiences as a young boy taught him to appreciate moments of joy, no matter how fleeting they are. Sure, his entire family lived in debtors’ prison, and young Charles spent his boyhood working as a bootblack, but that doesn’t mean you should give up hope, does it?

Try a little naughtiness

“Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip” — Gary Allan. This is for those who don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions. You know that if something is worth doing in the first place, you should do it today, rather than waiting. As far as Santa and Christmas, many of the people with the money in this world have done some of the meanest things imaginable en route to obtaining that money. Don’t be mean. But if you’re a consenting adult, being “naughty” can have very entertaining connotations. Keep it legal, keep it private. Be naughty today, because you can’t take it with you. Santa would approve. Remember, he’s a jolly old elf.

Be plenteous

“Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas” — Calvin Coolidge. What do you know, a former U.S. president who didn’t cave to special interest groups – at least not when it came to Dec. 25. Making people happy through simple gestures can feel good. Embrace family, friends and be loving. That’s something even “Silent Cal” couldn’t keep quiet.

Whether you’re merry, naughty or simply a lover of peace, here’s hoping you can enjoy the sentiment behind a very simple phrase: Merry Christmas!

Sources

Thinkexist.com

Oregonian Douglas Allen Smith has changed his name to Captain Awesome in honor of the character played by Ryan McPartlin on the TV show, "Chuck." Image: Gage Skidmore/Wikimedia Commons/CC-BY-SA

Douglas Allen Smith Jr. has changed his identity to become Captain Awesome. The 27-year-old Oregonian decided a change in his legal name was needed and he needed something with panache. So, he legally changed his name to Captain Awesome.

Douglas Allen Smith is now Captain Awesome

Unemployed cabinet maker Douglas Allen Smith Jr., 27, of Eugene, Ore., decided he needed to make a change.  He changed his name to Captain Awesome to honor a character on “Chuck,” his favorite TV show, according to the Eugene Register Guard. The character, Devon Woodcomb, played by Ryan McPartlin, was given the nickname because “a bad nickname builds character,” which appealed to Smith, and he set about changing his name to Captain Awesome. However, he had to face an incredibly skeptical judge who wasn’t initially receptive.

Captain Awesome awesomely wins case

Smith researched name change cases at the University of Oregon law library and successfully represented himself in court. The judge granted the name change, and he allowed him to change his signature to left and right arrows, which point inward toward a smiley face. The Oregon Department of Motor Vehicles accepted his new new signature and printed it on the back of his driver’s license. However, his bank wouldn’t have it, as the glyph would be too easily forged.

What’s in a name?

Despite the ease with which some people can change their legal names, some odd names go just a bit too far. Several years ago, a judge in New Zealand made a 9-year-old girl a ward of the court during a custody dispute between her parents, who had named her Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii. The judge was not amused and ordered a change of name. Other names, according to CBC News, blocked in New Zealand included Yeah Detroit, Sex Fruit and Keenan Got Lucy, but the names Violence and Number 9 Bus Stop were allowed.

Sources

Eugene Register Guard

CBC News

The FCC greatly desired to protect this from Ernie Anastos. (Photo: ThinkStock)

It began with a bizarre moment where WNYW/FOX Channel 5 New York anchorman Ernie Anastos exclaimed “Keep f—ing that chicken!” to weatherman Nick Gregory during a live news broadcast. The banter quickly became a viral sensation, and Anastos drew the ire of the FCC and its indecency rule. Family groups rallied alongside the FCC against the FOX affiliate. Now months later, something has occurred that some may consider poetic justice against an arbitrary, puritanical agency, while others will find the outcome perhaps even more bizarre than the initial incident itself. According to the New York Daily News, the 2^nd U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals has ruled that the FCC’s indecency rule is unconstitutional because it is “impermissibly vague.”

The FCC indecency rule: Protecting fragile minds

Considering the vast destructive power of innocuous television programs – a power that obviously trumps any efforts at parental guidance – the FCC indecency rule was obviously the right set of blinders at the right time. Dan Isepp of the Parents Television Council told the Daily News that he equates the court ruling with saying it’s OK to include cursing on TV, particularly during children’s programming. FCC Commissioner Michael Copps anticipates a Pandora’s Box effect. One imagines a scenario where a child or impressionable adult within hearing range of a tainted broadcast TV show is immediately possessed by the spirit of the Greek Furies and flies into a murderous blood rage. Or something equally unpleasant. Such is the awesome, dark power of cussing.

But nothing will change for 45 days

That’s how long the FCC has to appeal. The Supreme Court may still get involved in the indecency rule case, which should be interesting to see. If the appeals court decision stands, broadcasters will no longer be fined for using foul language on air. George Carlin’s famous “Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television” could conceivably see the light of day, and possibly seize your mind. The FCC will no doubt try everything it can to seize it back.

Sources:

New York Daily News

2^nd U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruling

Ernie Anastos’s apology, in case you were offended:

And a special shout-out to Mr. Anastos (punch line at :30):

Having knee shelves definitely qualifies for Awkward Family Photos. (Photo: Flickr)

Awkward Family Photos made a splash online last year as people from far and wide came to enjoy the stilted splendor and intense discomfort of people the world over whose most awkward posed moments were caught on camera. The bizarre family portrait depository created by Doug Chernack and Mike Bender went viral and became its own meme. Now the primo source for strange family photos is coming to the easily amused in convenient book form. If your computer literacy is as fresh as the 1970s attire commonly found on the Awkward Family Photos website, the book is for you.

Awkward Family Photos – in case you missed them

Awkward Family Photos is a website where we can all visit to laugh over just how strange other people look. Mike Bender and Doug Chernack began with just a few shots from friends and family, but things quickly took off. Rather than leaving those old family portraits buried in the pages of a photo album, Awkward Family Photos gives them new life. Now those theme photos, strange baby faces and shipwreck-from-the-past stylings are big business, so much so that Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb recently had Bender and Chernack on the “Today” show. The duo no longer needs payday loans with no fax.

“Awkward Family Photos” will debut at No. 3 on the NYT list

The website for Awkward Family Photos gets about 15 million hits and users submit more than 6,000 photos per month, so the book was a no-brainer. Considering that it will debut in the number three position on the New York Times best-seller list, other people’s embarrassment is clearly a hot commodity. Gifford, who is awkward enough on television, claimed she had photos of her own to contribute. Imagine just how awkward the non-celebrities who populate Awkward Family Photos must be – then run out and buy a copy of the book or find the funny on the Web.

Awkward vs. inappropriate

In general, Bender and Chernack claim that Awkward Family Photos is family friendly. They do their best to keep the more risqué shots off the website, and they aren’t in the book, either. The creators also do what they can to prevent family strife. If a photo goes up that causes friction, it will generally be removed from the site. Thankfully, there are so many hilariously appropriate submissions that Bender and Chernack claim they have “no shortage of material for future books.”

What’s next for the Awkward Family Photos crew?

Taking a page out of “America’s Funniest Home Videos,” Bender and Chernack are planning an awkward family videos site. It will be interesting to see if that site will capture the same “skewered on the end of a fork” moment-in-time feel that still photographs convey. Considering their success with Awkward Family Photos, it seems likely that whatever they touch will turn to extremely awkward embarrassment gold.

(Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/foundphotoslj/ / CC BY 2.0)

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Butt Drugs Commercial Video

The Butt Drugs commercial was created by comedy duo Rhett and Link. Known for their music videos and “internetainment”, Rhett and Link created the Butt Drugs commercial as a part of their “I Love Local Commercials” series. Funded with quick cash by business company MicroBilt, the “I Love Local Commercials” series asks people to nominate their favorite local business for free commercial creation.

See the Butt Drugs video here

Butt Drugs is a real store

Sure, the commercial is incredibly funny. The best part about the commercial, though, is that Butt Drugs is a real store, the kind of old-fashioned, small-town drug store that can rarely be found anymore. The store was founded in 1952 by businessman William Butt. Butt Drugs the store is now owned and operated by William’s son and granddaughter. The store has a pharmacy, general merchandise, liquor, and an old-fashioned soda fountain. The stuffed fishing trophies of the original store owner and his son still hang on the walls. When the store was first founded, the town was tiny – and as of the 2000 census, Corydon, Indiana only had 2,715 people. Beyond Butt Drugs, the one claim to fame that Croydon can take is that it was the original state capital of Indiana – before that capital was moved to Indianapolis in 1825.

Get Butt Drugs merchandise

If you can’t make the trip all the way to Corydon, Indiana, you can still have some fun with the punny excitement of Butt Drugs. The web site, ButtDrugs.com, offers everything from T-shirts to bumper stickers. Of course, it’s important to have as much of a sense of humor as you can – after all, Butt Drugs is an entirely legitimate name that just happens to incite a few giggles. Be prepared to answer a number of questions and get a lot of odd stares if you choose to declare your love of Butt Drugs.

Sidd Finch - aka Joe Berton - is among the most famous April Fools gags ever. (Photo: Flickr)

No April Fools 2010 wiki would be complete without a nod to the curious case of one Mr. Sidd Finch. Baseball fans who stumbled across the April 1, 1985 Sports Illustrated story must have simply glossed over the fact that it was written by George Plimpton, a notorious sports humorist, among the other letters in his literary Renaissance man palette. Many actually believed that the eccentric, quasi-mystical Finch made it to the New York Mets by way of Tibet (without payday loans, even) and that his fastball was routinely 65 mph faster than the fastest ever recorded in a baseball game. What they didn’t know is that the Sidd Finch that posed for photographs with the Metropolitans was none other than Joe Berton, a middle-school teacher from Oak Park, Ill.

His run as Sidd Finch makes him an eternal April Fools gag

Joe Berton may enjoy the game of baseball, but he had nothing on Sidd Finch. Finch’s love for the game was powerful enough to sway him from a life of yoga and yak herding. The legend goes that Finch developed his ability to fire a 168 mph fastball while wearing only one shoe when he chased snow leopards away from the yak herds that lived outside his Tibetan monastery, according to the Wednesday Journal of Oak Park and River Forest. How those two tasks relate specifically is anyone’s guess, but it may be explained by Sidd Finch’s love for the French horn. Or perhaps not.

Sidd Finch – aka Joe Berton – signs autographs for fans

Twenty-five years after his April Fools moment in the sun, Joe Berton still gets requests to sign autographs. Hopefully he doesn’t take the mound and attempt to let his old heater fly – at least without stretching first. In Aurora, Ill., Sidd Finch is so beloved that he will be inducted into the America’s Legends Museum. Joe Berton will be there with enough Sharpies to sign for everyone who comes around. A photo of Sidd Finch, complete with Mets jacket and the legendary single boot, will be enshrined in the Legends museum.

And the Mets still need pitching. Perhaps Sidd Finch would consider it a small personal loan of his time.

Related Video (NSFW due to very brief language at end of video):

April Fools, Google! Uh, I mean Topeka. At least they're both from Topeka, Kansas! (Photo: Flickr)

If you dig into Topeka, you’re bound to find good potatoes. That’s what “topeka” means in the Kansa and Ioway languages, according to Wikipedia: “To dig good potatoes.” But if you Google Topeka (or is it Topeka Google?), you will be caught in an infinite loop in which questions like “Why does Google say Topeka?” will cease to have meaning. For you see, Topeka is Google, and Google is Topeka. The search engine giant – in what amounts to more than a mere Google April Fool – has changed its name to Topeka, honoring that capital city of Kansas that just happens to have changed its name to Google. Don’t let it twist your brain into a Möbius strip. Thankfully, you’d need to iron it before that could happen. But first you’d need payday loans to buy a home surgery kit.

All roads lead to Topeka

If Topeka wasn’t an everyday part of your online life, it will be now. On the Official Google (er, Topeka) Blog, Topeka, Inc. Chairman and CEO Eric Schmidt quotes Google Mayor Bill Bunten as exclaiming that “Even Google recognizes that all roads lead to Kansas, not just yellow brick ones.” That was before the Google April Fool rift in space-time, so adjust your Element Zero grammar scanners accordingly. By their logic, no matter where you go, there you are in Topeka. While that may actually be possible with a Topological view of the cosmos – one where the entire universe is compact and connected – it would take some time to arrive in Topeka, after you’ve left Topeka. So long as you make it back for Kansas Day on January 29, you’re in for some good BBQ.

Wait, Topeka was Google only temporarily?

I hope Topeka has more resolve to stay the course. As it stands, Mayor Bunten unofficially changed the name of Topeka to Google for a month, in March 2010. A previous name for “the capital city of fiber optics” was “Topikachu,” for the Pokémon franchise that teaches children that animals can be crammed into small metal eggs. Topeka stepped up considerably when it became Google, even if it was a ploy to try to get the company to drop its highest-quality fiber optic lines there. Ideally, Topeka would have officially become Google so that the population could personally serve search results to every Topeka searcher in the U.S.

Eric Schmidt: Google feels ‘a kinship’ with the Great Plains city

Floods and tornadoes never keep a good Topekan down; they rebuild. Google equates that with releasing 2.0 versions of software, which only flies because this is a Google April Fool. Alfred E. Neuman is a typical man of Topeka. It is his kind of “What? Me Worry?” attitude that has steered the Google megalith into such stirring creations as Google Buzz. Just remember that they “aren’t in Google anymore,” Schmidt reminds. It is unclear whether he wrote that before or after he was attacked by flying monkeys.

What will Oliver Google Kai think of the rebranding?

Perhaps his parents will sue. Oliver Google Kai could get a name change with help from mommy and daddy – he’s only four years old – but why would he want to? Topeka is spud nomenclature, and nobody wants to be called a spud unless they’re 1986 NBA Slam Dunk Contest champion Spud Webb or need serious debt management help. Schmidt claims that Topeka will receive no special favors regarding the ultra-high-speed broadband project, but this whole Topeka – Google love fest seems a technological slam dunk.

(Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/yodelanecdotal/ / CC BY 2.0)

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The Loch Ness Monster is among the most famous hoaxes of all time. (Photo: Wikipedia)

It pays to be prepared when April Fools Day comes along, which means that you must be up on your history of the Top 10 April Fools pranks ever. Keep in mind that you might need payday loans to duplicate things on that scale. Without further ado, and straight from the Museum of Hoaxes, here are the Top 10 April Fools pranks in convenient, bite-sized form. Chomp ‘em, ’cause you got ‘em. And if you missed part one of this article – April Fools pranks you can easily play at home or work – CLICK HERE.

The Top 10 April Fools pranks, for your consideration

1. Swiss Spaghetti Harvest – Let’s start this Top 10 April Fools pranks list in tasty style. In 1957, the BBC convinced gullible Brits that the Swiss were growing spaghetti on trees.
2. Sidd Finch – Better known as Hayden “Sidd” (short for Siddhartha) Finch, this George Plimpton creation actually had baseball fans going for a while in 1985. (See video below.) “He’s a pitcher, part yogi and part recluse. Impressively liberated from our opulent life-style, Sidd’s deciding about yoga — and his future in baseball.” Oh, and he could throw a 168 mph fastball with pinpoint control. No sweat.
3. San Serriffe – Again, let’s laugh at those gullible Britons, circa 1977. The Guardian convinced thousands that this small republic that consisted of “several semi-colon-shaped islands located in the Indian Ocean” actually existed.  ”Its two main islands were named Upper Caisse and Lower Caisse,” and the capital city of Bodoni fell under the leadership of… wait for it… General Pica. If you believe that, I have some Zapf Dingbats to sell you.
4. Alabama Changes Pi – To the “Biblical value” of 3.0, of course. Because 3.14159 is an affront to all that’s holy.
5. Burger King’s left-handed Whopper – This began as an ad campaign and prompted about 90 percent of the population to ask for the right-handed version.
6. Nessie’s body – Yorkshire’s Flamingo Park Zoo claimed it had found the 15 -and-a-half-foot carcass, but it was really a bull elephant seal. A pranking zoologist shaved the whiskers off the dead body, stuffed the cheeks with stones and dumped it back in Loch Ness so that the public could discover the wonder.
7. Brassieres fuzz TV and radio reception – In 1982, The Daily Mail (yes, back to the UK) claimed 10,000 “rogue bras” were on the market with copper underwire that supposedly created enough static electricity when it came into contact with nylon and body heat that it threw local TV and radio signals for a loop. The chief engineer of British Telecom immediately used this as an excuse to grill his female employees about their type of bra.
8. Man flies by lung power – The New York Times printed a photo in 1934 of a man flying with help from a device that allegedly was powered by his breath. Supposedly that mighty wind spun rotors that created powerful suction. This kept him aloft – and proved that Americans don’t know much about physics. Perhaps they’re in such great need of debt repair that they can’t afford college, or at least some books about how airplanes work.
9. Whistling carrots – A British supermarket called Tesco claimed it had developed a genetically modified form of carrot that whistled. Ads claimed that the carrots grew with tapered air holes that produced a whistling sound when the vegetable was fully cooked.
10. Friends don’t let friends surf the Web drunk – John Dvorak of PC Computing magazine convinced readers in 1994 that Congress had passed a bill making it illegal to use the World Wide Web while drunk, or to discuss sexual matters on public networks. The first clue should have been the bill number (SB 040194 … 04/01/94), the second the name of the contact: Lirpa Sloof (April Fools backwards). It might be in bad taste to mention this now, but Sen. Ted Kennedy’s office received a great deal of mail on this one.

(Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/restedtraveler/ / CC BY-SA 2.0)

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Get the drop on your friends and loved ones with April Fools' pranks! (Photo: ThinkStock)

Tomorrow is April 1, and that means it’s time to roll out your bag of tricks and be ready to dust off your best April Fools pranks. Don’t believe people who tell you that pranks are a bad idea. So long as you don’t kill someone or otherwise violate their Constitutional rights – including the right to payday loans – let ‘er rip. The world needs good cheer.

April Fools pranks may date back to the Middle Ages

Wikipedia suggests several possibilities for the history of April Fools’ pranks, including Geoffrey Chaucer’s 1392 reference to “syn March bigan thritty days and two,” Eduard de Dene’s 1539 poem about a nobleman who sent his servants on foolish errands on April 1 and John Aubrey’s 1686 reference to April 1 as “Fooles holy day.” There are numerous other possibilities, but the point is that April Fools Day is made for April Fools pranks!

April Fools pranks for home and office

Wait, home AND office? Yes, that’s right. Some people seem to think that the big, bad recession has made the workplace a morgue. Poppycock. Life’s too short. April Fools pranks, tastefully done, are a fine gauge of whether you’re working in the right place. With that in mind, onward to some prank ideas (Thanks, Gather)!

At Home:

• If you have a sink with a spray handle, tape the handle down so that the next person who uses the sink gets a surprise hose bath!
• Rub clear liquid soap all over the door knob to your roommate’s bedroom!
• Fill your loved one’s shoes with talcum powder. With all that white powder, they’re sure to be mistaken for Lindsay Lohan wherever they go!

At Work:

• Cover a shallow rectangular box with cake frosting and leave it in the break room for co-workers!
• Put a tiny piece of Scotch tape over the mouthpiece of a co-worker’s desk phone!
• Similarly, open a co-worker’s non-optical computer mouse and put enough clear Scotch tape over the rolling pins inside the housing so that their mouse won’t work. IT departments will love this one, too!

Have a happy April Fools’ Day with these and more April Fools pranks!

If you have your own suggestions, feel free to comment and let paycheck loans customers know! If you hunger for more, CLICK HERE for the Top 10 April Fools pranks of all time!

Related Video (What NOT to do for April Fools’ Day):

President Obama's CFPA is under discussion in Congress. Image from Flickr.

When Funny or Die puts its collective brains together to make a point, nobody is safe. Their most recent bit of political commentary is a presidential reunion of Saturday Night Live proportions. The Funny or Die presidential reunion brings together an all-star cast of SNL presidents (and a guest or two) to talk about the Consumer Protection Act – a potential new federal law designed to protect consumers that are borrowing money.

Funny Or Die SNL presidential reunion worth every laugh

Sure, a bunch of fake presidents getting together to talk about the Consumer Financial Protection Agency sounds all kinds of boring. However, the all-star cast of SNL Presidents, directed by Ron Howard, had me laughing from beginning to end. Fred Armisen and Maya Rudolph step in as Mr. and Mrs. Obama, who are visited by everyone from both Bushes, a flirtatious Bill Clinton, a pratfalling Gerald Ford, Jimmy Carter, and even a rubber-faced Ronald Reagan. Sure, the topic is serious, but how can you not laugh when such an all-star SNL cast is involved?

Funnyordie.com video makes most laugh, a few die

While the Funny or Die video is actually very funny, it does have a very serious point. Every president in this SNL presidential reunion takes on at least some responsibility for the financial crisis of 2008 that kicked off the current recession. They also place blame squarely on the shoulders of under-regulated banks and financial companies. It’s a biting parody that makes a very strong point – something that Funny or Die has a history of doing well.

SNL Presidents call for the Consumer Protection Act

As the Jim Carrey / Ronald Reagan and Dana Carvey / George H.W. Bush points out in this funnyordie.com video, there are times that a president just has to say “screw it” and push through whatever resistance there is. The Consumer Protection Act is the federal bill that would create the Consumer Financial Protection Agency. This would be a federal agency dedicated to creating and enforcing clear rules to ensure fair payday loans, car title loans, overdraft loan programs, credit cards, mortgages, and most other financial products and programs.

See The SNL Presidential Reunion Video here

Some of us move in and out of relationships with supernal ease. When the final curtain falls and the arc lights fade, what’s left but to remove the grease paint and start pressing the flesh en route to the next gig? For others, however, finding a path out of the blast crater is a bit more challenging.

If you’re looking for quick loans, apply here. Of course, if you’re looking for my advice rather than money, try this: tell the story of when your relationship died at “It Was Over When.” The cathartic release will do you some good. Of course, quick cash for those annoying bill collectors can be cathartic, too.

Laugh that loser right out of your life

Stories tend to come from either side of the relationship cold war. There are escapees with horror stories of dating atrocities. Then there are ceremoniously dumped who know they have baggage that includes a sense of humor. Clueless individuals need not apply, as they probably don’t see how a site like “It Was Over When” could be important – or that anything they do could possibly end up there.

The exact moment when the relationship ended

The tipping point as documented on “It Was Over When” is akin to William Burroughs’ “naked lunch: a frozen moment when everyone sees what is on the end of every fork.” It could come after two dates, two years or (what seems like) two lifetimes. Whether it’s funny, sad or patently unbelievable, sharing the moment can be good for the survivor. As founder Robert Elder puts it, “It Was Over When” aims to “provide a bit of comfort, humor and, hopefully, healing identification.” For those who want to read of when love began, Elder also has “It Was Love When.” It all amounts to quick loans of sanity during an insane time, perhaps.

For our enjoyment, broken down by category

“It Was Over When” organizes the experiences of others into helpful categories. Here they are, along with my notes on personal favorites.

Chemistry

“Kim’s” story of the late date cracks me up:

“We met online and, after a few months, set up a date. He was supposed to arrive @ 7 p.m. He didn’t show until 11:30 p.m. Kept getting lost and calling me from various “lost” locations. I’m sorry, only an idiot would get this lost. Nonetheless, I kept the date and let Lost Boy into my home. At 12:30am, I yawned. He shot up from his chair and barked at me: “Sorry if I’m keeping you up or anything” and ran out the door.”

Sex

Here we have great stuff I cannot relate to you in this forum.

Quirks

“Nicole’s” relationship ended once she realized that her man preferred to play with her online avatar rather than be with her in person. He could “never really love me,” she writes.

Clashes

Manners

It’s interesting how more than one of the front page stories for this category has to do with money. Do I smell commentary on our society here?

Secrets!

Weird

And finally, Best of

Life is too short to cater to crazy. That’s why “Mark” left his relationship. His girlfriend was keeping a list of all his friends that she “hated for taking attention away from her.” Thankfully, as Mark relates, these friends are all still alive.

Your quick loans blogger enjoys “It Was Over When” and will contribute his own story soon

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Are they responsible for the Illinois earthquake? I think not. (Photo: daily44.wordpress.com)

No Barack Obamas, Rod Blagojeviches or Roland Burrises were harmed in the making of this story. Thankfully, Mothra avoided the Chicago area and Ronald Jones of Southland avoided utility shut off with the help of payday loans. Yet there was an Illinois earthquake anyway.

The Illinois earthquake came before dawn

MSNBC reports that the 3.8 magnitude Illinois earthquake was felt as far away as Iowa and Indiana, but the U.S. Geological Survey indicates that no damage or injuries were reported. It began around 4 a.m. Wednesday in an area about 50 miles northwest of Chicagoland. Needless to say, an Illinois earthquake, Chicago earthquake or whatever you want to call it is exceedingly rare. Luckily it was small – or as a Sycamore Fire Department spokesman told the media, “just a little shake.”

Kane County – the next fault line?

Not exactly, but Sheriff’s had to deal with a large influx of calls from startled residents. dispatchers near the epicenter in Kane County have been flooded with calls from startled residents. Books were tossed from their shelves and some residents were tossed from their beds according to Sheriff’s dispatcher reports, but it was nothing too serious.

If this had indeed been an Illinois earthquake emergency, the twin fairy princesses would have appealed to the great Mothra to spare the people of Chicagoland. Interpretive dance would have ensued, and surely someone has misplaced their dancing shoes. Quick payday loans would be imperative.

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This isn't the "Miss me yet?" billboard, but it's close. (Photo: synthstuff.com)

You know how these things go. A story begins on the World Wide Web that seems outlandish, but there’s just enough truth to it for the idea to stick. Like payday loans for what ails your budget, there is a real connection to the waking world. And the idea spreads virally, snowballing until it becomes a mass of sticky, gooey fun – a guilty pleasure people can dive into with grasping hands. Forget Photoshop and digital image alteration and check your brain at the door.

But sometimes these stories have a way of being true

Considering President Obama’s struggles with stimulus, bailouts, Nobel prizes and universal healthcare, it comes as no surprise that some Americans have questions. That’s the real-world connection that makes the “Miss me yet” billboard so believable. But as Bob Collins of Minnesota NPR reports, it’s also quite real.

It’s on the I-35 outside Wyoming, Minnesota. As you can see from the video below, former President George W. Bush has a question for all of us: “Miss Me Yet?”

Who-what-when-where-why?

It’s unclear at this time who paid for the billboard, but I think it is safe to say that Mr. Bush has better things to do with his time. Collins claims that his currently investigating the matter and will inform the nation once the secret is uncovered. My guess is that those who posted this “Miss me yet?” billboard gem won’t be too far removed from the people who erected the Barack Hussein Obama turban billboard. Yes, I chose the word “erected” intentionally, as certain folks get excited by racial malice. I am not one of those people; I just report about it, then taint the notion of impartiality with my rhapsodical wax.

Or did the “Miss me yet?” billboard come from ironic Obama supporters

I’ll leave that one to falsely accused ironists like Alanis Morrisette. I’m just a payday loans blogger today.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SEws-KukBE

Once upon a time, it was entirely fashionable to bash Sarah Palin. Oh, look at that lady from Alaska. She shoots wolves, winks a lot and can’t tell Katie Couric what she reads. She routes state money to build a “Bridge to Nowhere,” but she’s down-homey. Etc, etc, ad nauseous. So far, we know that no payday loans were harmed in the making of a Sarah Palin joke. She may not be a polished politician, but there are people who like what she claims to stand for. As to whether that’s actually what she stands for, we won’t know unless she unseats Barack Obama in 2012. There are certainly questions as to whether Obama stands for what he claimed to stand for during the campaign, but such is the razzle-dazzle of American politics.

Watch me pull a recessionary rabbit out of this hat!

Now those desperate to keep the “stupid” mask on Sarah Palin are pointing out the Palin cheat sheet to help keep her abreast of GOP priorities. AlterNet shares this rather dull nugget, via the Huffington Post. Words like “energy,” “tax” and “life American spirits” were supposedly written on the back of her hand, as was “budget cuts” with the first word crossed out. This was apparently for a Q&A session at the Tea Party Convention in Nashville.

Remember the Obama teleprompter?

Let’s be honest here. President Obama has taken his lumps for using a teleprompter at many (if not all) speaking events. Sarah Palin may not be the orator he is, but how much does it truly matter whether a politician is cribbing during a speaking engagement? What matters are policy decisions, something for which the American public dropped the ball in 1960. Kennedy vs. Nixon was decided not by policy, but by who was prettiest.

On burying the jump shot

Obama vs. Palin will be different in that it will deal with two pretty people. We’ll see if the president will have completely burned his bridges by 2012, and whether Palin will grow enough respect to reach outside her already established base. Payday loans will still be around in 2012, and so will people critical of both Obama and Palin. Since they can both play basketball, I say we decide it that way. One-on-one for the presidency… it’s what America demands, because we aren’t superficial!

(Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/billypalooza/ / CC BY-SA 2.0)

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Feel the weight of justice, America!

Sit on my face and tell me that you love me,
I’ll sit on your face and tell you I love you, too. – “Sit on My Face,” Monty Python

Dysfunctional relationships and domestic abuse are not laughing matters. If you feel you are in a dangerous relationship, contact your local authorities or crisis line immediately. Unfortunately, Mia Landingham and Mikal Middlestone-Bey displayed all the warning signs, but failed to resolve their problems peacefully. Now we have the timeless yet horrifying headline: “Woman kills boyfriend by sitting on him.” The defense for Mia Landingham apparently convinced a jury that the bizarre death came from an act of self-defense. She got off with probation and community service; no payday loans were needed for bail.

The ugliness of domestic disputes

The shades of gray in a dysfunctional relationship often resemble a murky bog, to the point where definitive truth becomes irretrievable. Mia Landingham and Mikal Middlestone-Bey obviously had problems. The 120-pound Mikal’s bizarre death beneath the 300-plus-pound Mia reportedly came during an argument. Sadly, the couple had three children together, children who are left to pick up the pieces of their shattered lives. It is a burden no child should have to bear.

Mikal’s family outraged

“I feel there wasn’t no justice,” said one of his sisters to the Associated Press. “Basically you can say that I can go sit on somebody and get probation?”

Yes, that’s right. And the judge had apparently seen the movie “Precious” and couldn’t keep a sister down.

She’d faced five years in jail

“I just want to say that I am sincerely sorry about this situation. I wish I could take it back,” Mia Landingham told the court. I’m sure she does. The heat of an argument can cause people to do foolish things, like calling someone hurtful names, throwing plates, smashing video game systems or even using the cat as a hacky sack (which I cannot condone). But sitting on someone until they die? I don’t think that’s a three years probation, 100 hours community service kind of crime. Domestic abuse or not, does the “burning bed” defense deserve to work? This payday loans blogger of consequence says that killing is a serious thing. For self-defense to be a valid excuse, serious evidence is needed. Oh, to have been a pig in the trough in that courtroom…

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Today, January 20, is National Penguin Awareness Day. What will you do to amuse this little penguin?

Of all Batman’s foes, none are as droll and umbrella-obsessed as the Penguin. His manner and hardware have nothing to do with the name, however. The man is short, squatty and loves to eat sardines like the Arctic creatures we know and love. Imagine Burgess Meredith, fresh from the 1960s “Batman” TV show. Today, he’d be squawking like crazy. Why? Does he need payday loans for a new umbrella flamethrower? No, it’s National Penguin Awareness Day!

The animal, not the master criminal

Much like yesterday’s National Popcorn Day, the exact date for National Penguin Awareness Day is a matter of some debate. Anywhere between January 13 and 20 – some say August – has been named as the target date. But sources like the Edinburgh Zoo (See: http://www.edinburghzoo.org.uk/SnippetAccess.aspx?id=434) and the ASPCA, both of whom know a thing or two about animals, appear more authoritative than others.

What should you do to celebrate?

Wear a tuxedo all day. Dress your children as penguins and feed them sardines. Or don’t. Kids get sick enough already. A real activity would be to go to the local zoo or aquarium where you can observe the real thing in action. If you happen to be an Antarctic research scientist, simply go outside. Whatever the case, marvel at these well-insulated animals that travel as far as 70 miles to reproduce in the same place they were born and prove the old adage that “it takes a village to raise a child.”

Honor popular penguins

Yes, pop culture is loaded with penguins, so make your National Penguin Awareness Day merry with movies and more.  Learn more about penguins online. Perform a Linux installation. Since you’re saving over Windows or Mac (saving you the need for payday loans), you’ll have enough money to fill the gas tank. What to do next? Why not go to the library and read about penguins. There are no limits to your National Penguin Awareness Day. That’s as it should be.

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"DaHjaj 'oH QaQ jaj Daq Hegh" if you don't look into these strange scholarship ideas, students!

Are you or someone you know preparing to go to college? Whether you’re a first time college applicant or a returning student, significant preparation is involved, particularly on the financial level. Payday loans won’t finance your journey through the halls of academia, so you’d do yourself good if you researched college scholarships for which you may be eligible. If you look hard enough, you’ll begin to see that being creative can help, because there are some strange college scholarships out there.

Top 12 weird college scholarships

Thanks to some fascinating work by the blog Zen College Life, I’ve picked out my favorite 12 from a larger list. Each of these strange college scholarships could be money in the bank for your college education – if you’ve got the moxie.

1. Duck Brand Duct Tape Stuck on Prom Contest – High school students who make the best prom outfits from the handyman’s cure-all are eligible for a $3,000 prize.
2. Society of Vacuum Coaters Foundation Scholarship – This has nothing to do with vacuum cleaners. If you are prepared to apply coatings to lengths of material at speeds of up to 500 feet per minute, then you may be eligible for a $2,500 college scholarship.
3. Sophie Major Memorial Duck Calling Contest – Think this is something people simply do for fun at the county fair? Well, there could be $2,000 in it for you, so start quacking.
4. Excellence in Predicting the Future Award – For a scholarship related to the world of high finance, you think they could shell out more than $400. I suppose some money is better than no money, however. Predict America’s economic future and be rewarded!
5. The Billy Barty Foundation – If you’re little (under 4-foot-10) and can provide documented proof of dwarfism, there could be big money in it for you.
6. National Marbles Tournament Scholarship – Start the kids while they’re young. Turn off the video games and get them outside so they can play marbles. If they win the related tournament here, they could earn between $1,000 and $2,000 in college scholarship bucks.
7. KLI Academic Award: The Kor Memorial Scholarship – The Klingon Language Institute accepts only the best and brightest. Even if you’re just out of Starfleet Academy and know no Klingon, you’re eligible to apply for this $500 college scholarship. If you need payday loans to repair your matter transporter to get to their hyperspace application office, beam on over to the application button for Personal Money Market that you see on the left side of this page.
8. American Association of Candy Technologists Scholarship – If you’re a college sophomore, junior or senior who majors in food science or a related are with at least a 3.0 GPA, $5,000 in sweet college money could be waiting for you.
9. OP Loftbed Scholarship – Dude, what are you going to Tweet to your BFF next? If you attend an accredited college (for a school other than the one of hard knocks, let’s say), spill the juicy to these guys and there might be $500 in college scholarship money in it for you.
10. American Nudist Research Library Scholarship – For many, college is about letting go and living the life you dream. If that dream includes unabashed nudity, apply for this scholarship!
11. Michigan Llama Association (MLA) Scholarship – If you’re a nudist, hopefully there are no curious llamas nearby. Because you never know what might happen. Seriously, if you’re a member of this select group (or the child of a member), you can apply for this college scholarship.
12. Mycological Society of America Scholarships – Studying mycology can be fun, but it can also be profitable for students, teachers and researchers. If you’re up on your fungi, there could be a $2,000 in it for you. Tell them Egon Spengler sent you.

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Do the National Popcorn Day, Mother Popcorn!

“Sometimes, sometimes I feel low
Sometimes I’m feelin’ low
I call another brother, talkin’ about Maceo
Maceo, blow your horn… I don’t want no trash, huh
Give me some popcorn!”   – James Brown, “Mother Popcorn”

When it comes to healthy snack alternatives, you can’t go wrong with popcorn. As the Godfather of Soul wailed, he don’t want no trash. That’s why most everyone who can stand some shell in the teeth and is willing to shake that salt is down for popcorn. It’s cheap, too; you won’t need payday loans to float this goodtime snack food habit, unlike gourmet potato chips (the only kind of potato chips worth eating, in my estimation). Think about doing the popcorn on National Popcorn Day, why don’t you?

Some say it falls on January 19, 2010

At least we know that it falls at the end of January. Close counts in more than just horseshoes and hand grenades when popcorn is involved. Even if it does technically fall on the date of the Super Bowl, so what? Let’s make two popcorn holidays! If that blows your mind, take out payday loans for therapy. Even the Popcorn Board doesn’t know the exact date, so I figure you should follow your heart.

But football watchers eat lots of popcorn

Yes, that’s true. We’re talking millions of people watching the Super Bowl, and popcorn will be invited to the party. So celebrate it on that date if you like. I’ll take Tuesday, January 19. But if you know for a fact – scientific fact, mind you -  that National Popcorn Day falls on another date and you know the arcane origins of the cornfest, let the Popcorn Board know.

Hot to pop? Here are some tips

You can slather it in butter, shake and salt it up, or even blast it with caramel and cheese. I’m more of a traditionalist, although I don’t mind venturing off the beaten path now and again. The Popcorn Board has some fun tips to put the groove in your National Popcorn Day. Some highlights:

• Put it on your soup or salad!
• Rock the garlic powder and/or season salt!
• If you’re kickin’ your cookin’ old school, spike the oil with spices!
• Hit the trail with a mix of popcorn, dried fruits and nuts!

Happy National Popcorn day from your payday loans source, Personal Money Market!

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