Michael Jackson Asexual, Product of Parasites?

Thank parasites for the joy of sex

Wait, wait, wait. This isn’t THAT kind of article. It’s THIS kind of article…

Whether you’re straight, gay, bi or asexual, it’s your own business. No one else’s. And your sexual orientation has absolutely no bearing on whether you can obtain pay day loans for quick cash.

But since everyone and their sex therapist is feeding upon the flesh of the media image that has been created for Michael Jackson, let’s talk about the significance of being asexual. According to Brooke Shields, she and Michael “instantly became friends” when he was 19 and she was 13. The reason for this, she claims, is that there was no sexual tension to get in the way.

Who’s on first? What’s second base?

The child stars spent a lot of time together, but instead of developing a sexual attraction, the relationship took a different course. Shields said he became “more asexual” as they grew. Yet he was curious about her previous relationships.

“He was like a little kid who talked about the bases – what first base was, what second base was,” Shields said. “It sounded very odd to the outside, I can imagine, but to the inside, to someone who’s never really left his bubble, you can understand how he would be curious.”

Is that as far as it went for him?

Nobody knows for sure, or if they do, they aren’t telling. I believe that is as it should be, considering how personal one’s sexuality is. But putting Michael aside for the moment, here’s an interesting question: What’s so great about sex?

Think about it. Think of the sum total of humanity’s visual arts, stories, poems, songs, dances, from the sublime to the crass. Look at science, evolution, our emotions and everything in-between. Even the Songs of Solomon or similar ancient literature. Sex is integral to who we are.

Science Daily suggests that the answer isn’t as evolutionarily obvious as it would seem. They refer to a recent article from American Naturalist magazine that sex evolved as a defense against parasites.

When ultra-efficiency = danger

The human race is still learning about sexuality. However, from an evolutionary standpoint, it is crystal clear that reproduction is necessary to ensure the survival of a species. Asexual reproduction seems quite efficient, in that it doesn’t require a partner. Furthermore, if an entire species has this ability, the odds of survival would seem great based upon the sheer math.

Why don’t the birds and bees take care of things before leaving home, then? Many scientists believe that asexual organisms are particularly susceptible to parasites. This susceptibility leads to a thinning of the herd, because perfect copies will all have the same vulnerability. If an enterprising young parasite or fatal disease strikes pay dirt and finds this opening, an entire species can be lost.

But what do you get when two crazy kids of any species get together and exchange genes (and jeans, if they’re into that)? You get genetically unique, genetically diverse offspring, often with different vulnerabilities. So parasites can’t Jonestown a carbon copy race formed via asexual budding.

Does diversity work?

When it comes to reproduction, yes, although more studies would be helpful. Scientists Jukka Jokela, Mark Dybdahl and Curtis Lively observed Potamopyrgus antipodarum (freshwater New Zealand lake snails) for 10 years, beginning with 1994. It’s one of those rare species that feature some populations that reproduce sexually and others that are asexual.

What did they find? Clones plentiful in the beginning were more frequently brought down by parasites over time. Some of these types became completely extinct. But the sexual snail populations remained stable. They lived to couple another day.

“The rise and fall of these female-only lineages was surprisingly fast and consistent with the prediction of the parasite hypothesis for sex,” Jokela said. “These results suggest that sexual reproduction provides an evolutionary advantage in parasite rich environments.”

Oh, don’t forget that pay day loans and quick cash can diversify your budget when short-term troubles come to call. Diversity is good that way, too.

We live in a parasite-rich environment, don’t we?

As great an entertainer and kind heart as he may have been, a race of Michael Jacksons would not have survived. The TMZs, Stars and Enquirers of the parasite kingdom would have burned out the gene pool. But I digress. It isn’t a fact that Michael Jackson was asexual. I tend to believe that he was extremely repressed and never grew out of childhood as a defense mechanism against abuse. I could be wrong, but I don’t think so.

I wish Michael Jackson the peace he may have found only rarely in life.

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