John Edward the Psychic Launches Infinite Quest

Don’t use pay day loans for this

My maternal great grandmother (my mother’s mother’s mother) was a spiritualist minister. I know very little of her history, but I remember that my grandmother once told me that she summoned spirits to ask questions and gather information. Her faith ventured into the realm of what we know as parapsychology. Spiritualists of that nature tend to believe in the Christian God, but in this case the spirits of the dead don’t wait for the call from the bullpen before they come out of their memorial tombs. That’s apparently where the spiritualist ministers came in, as medium guides (or is it shameless hucksters). If a medium “reveals” that your dear Aunt Gladys wants you to apply for pay day loans and put that fast cash on the collection plate, let rational sense prevail and look at your budget. If you need the money to help pay an important bill that’s late, let that be your guide.

The American psychic tradition is closely tied to spiritualist belief. Without the 19^th century showmen (and women) who tripped the spirit lights fantastic, there would be no Edgar Cayce, no Uri Geller and definitely no John Edward, psychic. Sometimes his name is misspelled Edwards, but psychic he is, nevertheless. And now he wants to bring you his special brand of quality psychic chicanery, courtesy of a new Web site called Infinite Quest.

Run by a team of psychic showpeople

Germain Lussier blogs on Twirlit that there are differing schools of thought on this popular psychic. Is he a genius? A fraud? Or something in between? Ask the people who appear in the studio audience of his television program and they’ll say that the connections Edward is able to make – the “psychic” inferences – are surprising. I say he knows how to manipulate the emotions of his audience and knows enough about human psychology to ask the kind of questions that make people think he’s forming a deep connection with them.

Whatever your opinion of the man’s work, there’s no denying that there’s a market for this kind of thing. Since not everyone can make it on one of his shows and John Edward (psychic!) can’t possibly visit the homes of each and every person with a deep desire to be fleeced, Infinite Quest is a reasonable facsimile. In addition to the mojo hand of the TV psychic, there are astrologists, numerologists, fellow physics and more waiting to give Web surfers the best astral and ethereal plane sojourn possible. And as Bill Cosby says on “Fat Albert,” victims “just might learn something.”

Your spiritual mulligan

In addition to the ability to access the help of real, honest-to-goodness circus performers and gerbil whisperers, there are sections on Infinite Quest that explain what the uninitiated need to know about the afterlife, positive and negative energy, the tarot, spiritual health and reincarnation (for your spiritual mulligan). Some of the information is free, but the “money shot” is reserved for paying customers.

Speaking of the money shot, John Edward recently appeared on Sean Hannity’s television spectacle on Fox News. According to Lussier, here’s what Edward had to say about the importance of Infinite Quest:

“I’ve been doing this work for 25 years. And I’ve been involved with astrology, numerology, you know, energy, alternative belief philosophy, reincarnation. And I want to give people the opportunity to say maybe,” he said.

Until the birds begin to nest in my skull and use my brain like a beanbag chair, I’ll say no. Since John Edward must know when I’m going to die, I’m sure he’ll be camped outside my house. If he hassles me before then, I’ll untie his laces with the power of my mind. If he needs new eyelets and aglets for his designer shoes, he can send the ghost of Elvis out for pay day loans and fast cash. That’ll be an infinite quest, all right…

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