Cell Phone Elbow is Your Smartphone Malady of the Day

Cell phones can make you weak

He doesn't have cell phone elbow, ladies and gentlemen. He IS a cell phone.

Aches and pains tend to follow you through life, like uninvited guests who fart in your rose garden. I say “you” because I plan to have my limbs replaced by cybernetic meat hooks.

But back to that rose garden. I beg your pardon, but take a whiff. Ahhhhhh… oh. You crave freshness but you get a sense of something most foul. Fortunately it’s never that way with a loan till payday. Such quick payday loans are a breath of fresh air when your budget has been hit by a bunker-buster. It can power you through the rubble until your next paycheck rolls in like a UN peacekeeping force. But if you’ve got cell phone elbow, you won’t be able to help them bulldoze away  the mess.

That’s right, cell phone elbow

Everybody’s tied to their mobile devices anymore, so I guess cell phone elbow was inevitable. iPhones, Blackberries, Palms, T-Mobiles and their kind aren’t just telephones, they’re personal planners, messaging systems, music players and gaming systems. But more than anything else, they’re time wasters, and most people are happy to oblige. I’m guilty, too, but I excuse myself from this discussion because I possess abilities and powers that far exceed those of most people writing this article.

Madison Park reports for CNN that “if your pinkie and ring fingers tingle or feel numb, you might not want to pick up that cell phone to call the doctor.” That’s because orthopedic surgeons are fighting back the tide of cell phone elbow. Smartphones apparently don’t make enough people smart enough to avoid giving themselves nerve damage via elbows bent for too long.

But are there no earpieces? No speakerphones?

Personally, I hate Bluetooth earpieces (uncomfortable) and speakerphones (I actually care about not making private conversations public). But I also don’t spend hours talking on my iPhone. If I can use E-mail of IM for something, I will. But most people still prefer verbal communication, so they hold the phone to their ears. As they do this, they “stretch a nerve that extends underneath the funny bone and controls the smallest fingers,” writes Park. After a long period of time, the bent arm position “chokes the blood supply to the nerves. It makes the nerves short-circuit. The next thing you know, there’s tingling in the ring and small finger,” said Dr. Peter J. Evans of Ohio’s Cleveland Clinic.

Unlike Selsun Blue, if it’s tingling, it ISN’T working. Stop bending your arm, or at least switch hands. You don’t want cubital tunnel syndrome. Your hands will become weak, you’ll have difficulty opening simple jars and containers and you won’t be able to play musical instruments well. It’s life out of balance for the handy. And can you imagine not being able to write, either?

“It could impede your typing ability, your writing ability,” Evans said. “People get very unintelligible writing if it gets severe.”

Droppin’ things

Park introduces us to Donna Malloy, 66. Malloy felt the numbness in her hands and wondered what was wrong. It never occurred to her that talking on a cell phone for hours could be so harmful.

“Mainly when I was holding something, I noticed, ‘Geez, they’re tingling.’ It got progressively worse. If you walk around holding the cell phone, after a while you’re not sure you have it in the hand anymore.”

Then basic functionality in her left hand began to slip. She’s drop things from her left hand that she normally carried with no problem. She could no longer pursue her pastime of needlework, either.

“Constant cell phone use could stress out the ulnar nerves,” said Dr. Leon Benson, spokesman for the American Academy of Orthopedic Surgeons. After repeated stretching, the ulnar nerve can become weak. “The more you bend it, the more it stretches,” Evans said. “It diminishes the blood supply, and the blood is not flowing through the nerves.”

Aren’t nerves supposed to stretch a bit?

Sure, but not for an hour. “It’s not normal,” Benson said. People with severe cases of cell phone elbow (such as Ms. Malloy) must have surgery. But lesser cases merely require an adjustment in how the joints are used. It doesn’t mean no more cell phones, it just means a bit more caution and discipline.

“It’s like anything else, any sporting activity,” Benson said. “You can hit balls at the driving range — just don’t hit 300 of them, because you’ll be sore. So common sense would dictate not to talk on the phone for hours if your small and ring fingers go numb.”

Not just for cell phones anymore

“Cell phone elbow” doesn’t just apply to those who overuse cell phones. Anyone who rests their elbows for hours at a time on the arms of a chair, wheelchair or the open window of a car are susceptible. Even those who sleep in the fetal position or frequent computer users with elbows bent beyond 90 degrees for a long time could damage their nerves, hints Evans.

More than a 90-degree bend can stretch the ulnar nerve by as much as 15 percent, says Evans. But here are some simple solutions he suggests:

• Avoid activities that require you to bend your elbow like that for an extended period of time
• Make sure your computer workstation is ergonomic enough to help you avoid this situation
• Don’t lean on your elbows for too long
• Use a loan till payday or quick payday loans if your budget is doubled over more than 90 degrees to Sunday (my suggestion, if you couldn’t tell)…

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